Friday, April 28, 2017

Mango Slush

When I went to see the new doctor/therapist the other day, she gave me something to read.  I finished reading that today...

A few powerful messages from the reading that stood out to me...

1. "Act as if" and "commitment"- act as if you count by giving 100% commitment to what you are doing...

That hit me- do I give my kids 100% of my attention when I am with them?  no
Do I give my husband 100% commitment and attention when I am with him? no
Do I act as if I count when I am doing what I'm doing at that moment?  no

There are times when I am with my family but am I really WITH them?  Or am I sitting there wishing I was somewhere else, thinking about all the things I need to do... thinking about the shirts I need to make, thinking about the cleaning I need to do... NO!  I am not giving them 100%.  I am constantly trying to juggle everything that I end up doing EVERYTHING halfway, halfway commited.

Does that ever get anything done?  NO!

I might not be able to explain this next concept but I'll try...

The article also talked about dividing things that are important in your life into a 3X3 grid with 9 boxes.  Sometimes we have just a 1X1 grid with one thing taking over our whole life and when that one thing is gone, we are left with an empty feeling.  So instead, make is a 3X3 grid so that if one thing goes away (i.e. job, relationship) then you aren't left feeling completely empty and can continue to function.

I do this.  I put so much focus on ONE thing, I put my whole heart into it that when it fails or goes away... I'm left feeling empty. Not that there aren't other areas in my life that can take over... just that I'm completely overwhelmed and empty when that 1 thing completely devastates me and makes me feel empty.

So, my new grid... trying to think of all 9 things I want in my grid... so that if one thing fails, I can continue to function and put my focus on the other 8 things (an eventually replace the empty hole with something else).... but my life won't completely crumble...

Kids
Husband
Church (we will talk more about this in another blog)
Halleahwood
My House
Myself
Family
Friends
?
?

I'm struggling with what I should put in all of my boxes... and that's ok.  I'll think more on it and see how I should do that.

But with those things mentioned above- when I am with my kids I will try to give them 100% of my commitment... acting as if I count in their lives... acting as if they are the most important to me at that moment.

When I am with my husband- I will give him 100% of my commitment, acting as if I matter to him... acting as if I am the most important person to him.

When I am working (Halleahwood), I will give 100% of my commitment, acting as if I count... acting as if it is the most important job I've ever had...

(you also then make goals for each box... I'll expand at another time)

etc.

And at the end of the reading, one sentence stood out to me and is going to be my mantra this year...

IF YOU ALWAYS DO WHAT YOU'VE ALWAYS DONE, YOU'LL ALWAYS GET WHAT YOU'VE ALWAYS GOT!


I picked the kids up from school today, I listened to my oldest talk about how he was upset that he did not get a slush today after getting 100% on a program they do on the computer (granted, this could be something he didn't get 100% on... or maybe he didn't get it before she printed out the list of kids who got 100%)... and I listened to my daughter talk about her great day and playing games... etc...

So I took my kids to sonic and let them get a slush.  My oldest wanted to get his friend one, so I let him do that.  It ended up costing me $2.46 for 4 small slushes... and I know I didn't have to do that... but I wanted them to know that I want to celebrate their happy moments and be there for their sad times... I wanted to show them that I listen and they are special to me...

And I really wanted a MANGO SLUSH...

Until next time...



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